
The joys of Sales Meetings in the Corporate World
The following story is a little bit suggestive so I am warning you ahead of time. I have pre-sent this to Sarah and Bern to make sure it is not offensive, however if you are offended I apologize ahead of time and ask you to understand that there is no simpler way of describing the very real and true events that followed! So be warned.
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A few years back at a sales meeting the Notational Sales manager was busy telling us the plans for the future and embellishing on the need for us to step up our sales and maintain our current client base.
One of our sales team members had this ability to fall asleep within a few minutes which would have been fine if this only happened at sales meeting.
However I have had the delightful experience of going to prospective clients with this particular gentleman.
Right in the middle of a meeting, while the client is describing his needs and requirements, Shaun falls asleep (not his real name for obvious reasons). No warning, no prelude, no yawn, just nods off.
I sit there trying to distract the client by showing him something specific on the proposal or ask him about his pictures on his desk, all the while trying to slip down my chair to kick Shaun on his ankle or knee or wherever my foot may land.
I was hoping the client would not notice the sudden decline in my height because I am rather short. (I have been called HOBBIT by Bern’s Nephew). I was suddenly lower than the desk in front on me while I searched around for Shaun’s leg. I am sure the client was confused or amused but I am not sure as this was the first and last meeting I had with this client.
I finally made contact; however my kick must have been a little too energetic because in a second of silence there was a sudden loud burst of obscenities spewing out Shaun’s mouth.
“What the F #$* which was followed by; what the F##$ was that for, I’m up, I’m Up.”
Well if this was not enough I had to ask him very discretely to remove the spittle from the side of his mouth. Needless to say we did not manage to secure that business.
As we walked out it was quite obvious that Shaun had developed quite a noticeable limp. I tried to avoid going on sales calls with him in the future.
Warning - read on if you have heeded my message above.
For some reason they believe their new sales reports and stat reports will facilitate us in being more efficient! When in fact all this will do is make us spend more time in the office filling out paper work to satisfy their undernourished egos! - As he spoke he paced up and down the front of the Board room in front of his 15 sales people.
Ranting and raving, lifting his hands in frustration. We could see the frustration on his face and we sympathized and agreed with him as this has added a lot of paper work and sales people are notoriously bad at doing paper work. He then added red in the face and almost spluttering -
"Ours is not to question why - but do and this is what Clit has deemed necessary”
As the words came out of his mouth he realized what he had called our CEO, whose name is CLIFF. We burst out laughing and he picked up his file and pen and walked out of the board room. We sat there waiting for him to return and when he did not return, I was nominated to go and see if he was returning.
I walked into his office and I saw him sitting there, with his head in his hands, bright red in the face; his rather large ears were like beacons for unidentified flying objects -speaking to himself, and repeating over and over again;
“I don’t believe I said that, I don’t believe I said that”
I cleared my throat and he looked up at me in shame and humiliation. He said to me,
“Its one thing to think those things when you are annoyed with your boss, but totally another to say them out loud.
He then he added"it was a slip of the tongue", which was the last thing he should have said as he went redder if that was at all possible, and “Um what I mean is; what I wanted to say was; Never mind, you get the drift.”
I walked out so as not to humiliate him any more but I am sure he heard me cackling all the way down the long passage.
When I am given the opportunity I still remind him of his Slip of the tongue
The following story is a little bit suggestive so I am warning you ahead of time. I have pre-sent this to Sarah and Bern to make sure it is not offensive, however if you are offended I apologize ahead of time and ask you to understand that there is no simpler way of describing the very real and true events that followed! So be warned.
_________________________________________________________________
A few years back at a sales meeting the Notational Sales manager was busy telling us the plans for the future and embellishing on the need for us to step up our sales and maintain our current client base.
One of our sales team members had this ability to fall asleep within a few minutes which would have been fine if this only happened at sales meeting.
However I have had the delightful experience of going to prospective clients with this particular gentleman.
Right in the middle of a meeting, while the client is describing his needs and requirements, Shaun falls asleep (not his real name for obvious reasons). No warning, no prelude, no yawn, just nods off.
I sit there trying to distract the client by showing him something specific on the proposal or ask him about his pictures on his desk, all the while trying to slip down my chair to kick Shaun on his ankle or knee or wherever my foot may land.
I was hoping the client would not notice the sudden decline in my height because I am rather short. (I have been called HOBBIT by Bern’s Nephew). I was suddenly lower than the desk in front on me while I searched around for Shaun’s leg. I am sure the client was confused or amused but I am not sure as this was the first and last meeting I had with this client.
I finally made contact; however my kick must have been a little too energetic because in a second of silence there was a sudden loud burst of obscenities spewing out Shaun’s mouth.
“What the F #$* which was followed by; what the F##$ was that for, I’m up, I’m Up.”
Well if this was not enough I had to ask him very discretely to remove the spittle from the side of his mouth. Needless to say we did not manage to secure that business.
As we walked out it was quite obvious that Shaun had developed quite a noticeable limp. I tried to avoid going on sales calls with him in the future.
Warning - read on if you have heeded my message above.
For some reason they believe their new sales reports and stat reports will facilitate us in being more efficient! When in fact all this will do is make us spend more time in the office filling out paper work to satisfy their undernourished egos! - As he spoke he paced up and down the front of the Board room in front of his 15 sales people.
Ranting and raving, lifting his hands in frustration. We could see the frustration on his face and we sympathized and agreed with him as this has added a lot of paper work and sales people are notoriously bad at doing paper work. He then added red in the face and almost spluttering -
"Ours is not to question why - but do and this is what Clit has deemed necessary”
As the words came out of his mouth he realized what he had called our CEO, whose name is CLIFF. We burst out laughing and he picked up his file and pen and walked out of the board room. We sat there waiting for him to return and when he did not return, I was nominated to go and see if he was returning.
I walked into his office and I saw him sitting there, with his head in his hands, bright red in the face; his rather large ears were like beacons for unidentified flying objects -speaking to himself, and repeating over and over again;
“I don’t believe I said that, I don’t believe I said that”
I cleared my throat and he looked up at me in shame and humiliation. He said to me,
“Its one thing to think those things when you are annoyed with your boss, but totally another to say them out loud.
He then he added"it was a slip of the tongue", which was the last thing he should have said as he went redder if that was at all possible, and “Um what I mean is; what I wanted to say was; Never mind, you get the drift.”
I walked out so as not to humiliate him any more but I am sure he heard me cackling all the way down the long passage.
When I am given the opportunity I still remind him of his Slip of the tongue

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