Enter at own Risk!!

The Motto's in our home is:

If you don’t like Animals please do not visit. It’s called FURniture for a reason!! And why would you think humans who have no Fur need to sit on it. I should have a sign that says Beware of the Flying Leaping Playing animals and that used to mean beware of my Children, but alas it now means my furry children.

I really thought this morning was going to be an easy one. The animals were their usual crazy self with excitement and eager to go out and then have breakfast. I am sure you have heard of the expression – Learn from your mistakes; I was prepared - Had Jinx’s toy in my hand so she would not play the “slink between my legs as she walks” down the passage.

Well this was such a stupid idea and I really should have known better because she got so excited it was let’s trip mom up, jump up and grab toy and get all excited. Now I explained Fiona is very placid normally. But I think this pup has brought out the puppy in her too. She decided to nip my toes with excitement as I walked, stumbled down the passage. I learnt a great new dance this morning! Hop skip, stumble, and slide.

Okay okay I am still not too old to learn new tricks. Note to self…… stay in bed. Train dogs to switch off alarm and let themselves out… not before putting the kettle on…. In a perfect world!!!

So now the dogs are fed, coffee made. I have to go outside to find the electricity box to take a reading because the meter - hasn’t been read since we moved in. I found a note from them asking for a reading.

We live in a really lovely home with this humongous garden. And finances are a bit tight so the garden is not as neat as I would like. Waiting for the garden service to work for free!!

Imagine the excitement of the animals. Not only have I fed them, I am in the garden with them. When am I going to learn to put the dogs away when I am on a mission or need to do something without being “Fair Game” to them?

I wonder into the garden, think I know where the meter is. Wearing my night shirt. And thankfully sleeper shorts and white slip on shoes I traipse into the garden. It’s been raining so the garden is wet. The bushes are quite high. The grass growing wildly, and the weeds … , oh dear if they were flowers my garden would be considered beautiful.

Now I look through the bushes. Search the obvious areas I think a meter would be. Am getting frustrated because the dogs think I am playing hide and seek. You know exactly what I mean. As I bend down to look in between a bush or weed bush, I get greeted by them right up in my face. Get licked for my efforts and slobbered on and I am now really frustrated.

Jinx thinks she has found a pony and tries to climb on my back. I’m yelling at them to behave. Wipe the slobber out my eyes as I am blinded by doggy food breathe. Charming! Crawl out backwards and do not know whether I should laugh or cry. Why do I choose to do these dangerous things on my own without Animal Control around to help!

Why can they not tell you where the damn meter is on the stupid slip I have to fill out and I am ranting and raving and doing the dodge the dogs dance? Is this the electricity department idea of a joke?

Legs covered in mud and white shoes not so white anymore, give the garden one last look. Well the jungle is a better description. No luck, amble back to the French door… Notice this funny metal cover on the wall just outside the French door. Inspect it closer. Yes!!!!! This is the electricity meter. I look around to make sure this dance of mine has been unobserved. But out of the corner of my eye I catch my neighbor looking out their top window.

I am now horrified because as much as I am not under dressed, I am most certainly not pleased to have my neighbour check me out bending over and searching through the bushes with the animals helping me. I am sure that was a sight and a half. My Lilly white legs, Sleeping Top, white slip on shoes. Only to witness Jungle Jane wrestle the dogs away and come out all muddy only to find the meter on the wall. I should have been wearing one of those Pith Helmets of the great explorers. “Livingstone I presume”

I swear I saw the neighbour double over with laughter or maybe he fell off the chair he was using to spy on me. That will teach him to be spying on his neighbours. As I walked into the house I fell into a fit of giggles…
Imagine the Head Lines in the News Paper.

"Man dies of Fits of Laughter, neighbour being sort for questioning, however jungle too deep and too dangerous to enter. Police are asking the public for assistance. “

Had this vision of my neighbour having to call for an ambulance as he needed mouth to mouth or some electric shock to stop laughing at me hysterically.

I must have looked a sight - especially when I noticed the meter on the wall and hit myself on the head.